"That Wag" is a recording of the band, predominantly Andy, joking around during recording for the 1992 album Nonsuch. It appeared on Andy's Fuzzy Warbles Volume 1 in 2002. The title comes from "That Wave," the song they were rehearsing at the time; "That Wave's" demo follows immediately after "That Wag" on the tracklisting.
Andy: “Caught while we were making the Nonsuch album in Chipping Norton studios. Unknown to me, the late Gus Dudgeon would instruct engineer Barry Hammond to flick on a DAT tape, and capture all the between takes idiocy. It's a miracle we ever got any songs down.”
- [All spoken by Andy. unless otherwise noted]
[Imitating Robert Smith] Who's got my lips; have you got them? My lips have disappeared totally. Lipstick, anyone?
[Normal] Okay, look, um...
[Someone in the back: Ah... [damn?]]
..Two, three. [Sings] That wave [Begins playing, stops]
Can we just- it took me totally by surprise. You said, "damn," and I thought you were saying "one." [Background laughter] Ah, ah, wah-wah-wah-wah-wah. [Unintelligible background speaking] A-one-an-a-two-an-a-three-an-a-four-an-a...
[Unintelligible background speaking]
Four beats? [Makes silly laughter]
[Hi-hat begins tapping rhythmically] One, two, three. [Sings] That wave- I did it again - For fuck's sake, I'm so sorry!
Hang on [Strums] That. Thank christ he isn't filming this. [Silly voice] Hello 'Canerder.' [Background laugh]
[Plucks strings while disjointedly singing "That" and "Wave," trying to find the key]
I found the string.
Yup-buy-ya-ba-ba-ba-[Gargles]. That wave. [Normal] Something wrong with this mike, Barry. [Drums played over Andy gargling, unintelligible.]
[Continues gargling while speaking] There's something wrong with this microphone Barry. Barry! Can y' come and fix it? (Unintelligible.) [Laughs]
[Brief strum] Barry! [Hearty background laugh] What's wrong with it?
I see that he's playing like, um... He's- he's playing lead guitar like Arthur Askey at the moment. [Heart background laughing, Andy snorts] The Arthur Askey Experience.
[Impromptu drum and bass jam]
[Geordie accent] So, you...
I used to manage the Arthur Askey Experience, ya, like, you know... And I say to Arthur...when you do the bee song, you've got to play the comb and paper with your teeth, Arthur.
[Mr. Jiggs voice] Hi, I've got my, uh, rhythmical head on. Tch, uh, you know, right now, and, uh, tch, we should really, uh, do this. [Laughs in-character] I just, uh...
[Laughs normally] I haven't done a Mr. Jiggs for a long time.
[Back in-character] I, you know, tch, like, uh, tch, uh, get tch-rhythmical, like, you know...
[Goofy voice] THAT WA-HEH-HEH-HEH-HAVE...
Heh, hang on. The Cure's version. [Plays rough chord, parodys Robert Smith's morose singing]. That wave. Pull me into your hair. I'm so unhappy, I think I'm going to kill myself. That wave. Oh, god. Oh, christ I'm so unhappy.
[Normal] Smith's version.
[Plays briskly, parodys Morrissey's singing]. That wa-ha-have. That wa-ha-have. That wave pull me into your ha-ha-hair. Heh heh heh-heh. Oh, that wa-ha-have. Ho-ho ho ho.
[Normal] Actually that's two notes. [Morrissey] That wa-ha-have.
[Robert Smith, again] Oh, who's got my lips? Oh...
[Imitating Bob Dylan] That wave. (Unintelligible)..cascading. Well, I flew down to the bottom of the sea, where I questioned the fishes all about it. Well, I was in heaven, address Cloud Eleven. (Unintelligible)
[Laughs normally] That's right. [Effeminate voice] I say, I'm peaked. See you in the chops.