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"When You're Near Me I Have Difficulty" is a song by Andy Partridge. It appeared on the 1979 album Drums and Wires.

A BBC recording appeared on the 1998 Transistor Blast box set.

An unused single version appeared on the 2002 Coat of Many Cupboards box set.

QuotesEdit

Andy (on the unused single version): “A bit more in tune than the D+W cut with better skank per square inch. Hey daddyo, dig that crazy ending. But would it have made a hit single? Not as long as I've got a hole in my arse.”

LyricsEdit

When you're near me I have difficulty respirating

When you're near me I have difficulty concentrating

When you're near me I have difficulty standing upright

When you're near me I have difficulty sleeping at night


I used to stand proud like a sphinx

In a noble immovable state

Then your heart nailed me under a jinx

Now I'm feeling like a jellyfish

Just a spineless wobbly jellyfish

And it's great, great, so great


When you're near me I have difficulty respirating

When you're near me I have difficulty concentrating

When you're near me I have difficulty standing upright

When you're near me I have difficulty sleeping at night


I used to stand high like a pine

Just a piece of emotionless wood

When you put your body near mine

Now I'm feeling like a jellyfish

Just a spineless wobbly jellyfish

And it's good, good, so good


I used to be an iceman

Living in iceman town

So I'm warning all you cool cool icemen

You'd better be prepared to be melted right down

down


When you're near me I have difficulty

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